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Annette Duval

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Annette Duval Empty Annette Duval

Post by Captain Awesome USMC Tue Aug 04, 2015 11:10 pm

World: PRIME
Name: Annette Laura Duval
Age: 15
Position: Grade 9

Image:
Appearance: Annette has a slim, medium build for a girl her age at 5'5 and 126 lbs. She has a fair light skin tone from her French Canadian background, upper back-length brown hair with a single small braid just in front of her left ear and soft brown eyes. She has a light bust and enjoys wearing clothing that suggest a rebellious nature, despite her cheery behavior...half of the time. When she is in her fatigued and moody stage, she exhibits a much more annoyed expression as the default and her hair usually is a bit more messy from her lack of motivation in the mornings while getting ready for the day. Her eyelids lower down to half-mast and her cute grin turns into a flat nothing.

Backstory: Annette was born a perfectly healthy little girl into an upper middle class family from the outskirts of Montreal. Her father, a man of business, worked in the city while her mother raised Annette and her younger brother. As a child, her parents made sure their children knew proper etiquette and manners. Annette dressed properly and acted just like a fragile doll whenever her parents expected important company or during special events. Anything to keep up the image of her family, she was to do and she did so for years. It was not until she reached age 13 that, much to the dismay of her parents, she began breaking from the path her parents set out for her. She listened to music alone in her room and started dressing less traditionally with her style. She never disliked her parents even if they really detested her decisions and tried to inhibit them. It was not long before her attempts to keep her new-found freedoms earned her the status of being the 'black sheep' of the family. The relationship with her parents may have been strained but at least, in her eyes, she was relatively normal now. At least...for almost a year she was...
During her eighth grade school year, she became very ill but could not seem to recover fully. While her fever was gone after two weeks, she remained incredibly tired and she had a lot of pain in her...well, everything. Her joints felt stiff and it hurt to move, she also had an everlasting, infinitely painful migraine and all her muscles ached. She tried sleeping a lot but the fatigue never seemed to go away, no matter how much she rested day and night. Her doctor had a few guesses as to what was wrong but was not sure. The staff at her local hospital were baffled by her condition and had no idea other than complete speculation as to what it could be. It is safe to say she got a bit sidetracked from her school work and as a result could not finish the year.
Myalgic Encephalomyelitis (known as M.E.). That was the world out of the doctor's mouth but Annette could not, for the life of her, repeat it back to anyone. A physical disability that causes the afflicted to inexplicably remain fatigued no matter how much rest he or she gets for months on-end. Each case is often VERY different from the next but the fact that the average case develops in later middle-age...Annette's case is down-right rare, though not unheard of. All the more reason to hate the world for her horrible luck. She was supposed to be a Freshman in high school right now, but look where she is? Practically bed-ridden at home. It just is not the same with her friends now that she really only feels enough drive to hang out for about six months out of the year and even then she is now being home schooled for repeating her eighth grade year and cannot regularly coordinate with her friends because of this. It was not long before she became very depressed...
She did not want to do anything. She did not want to eat. She was nearing the end of her annual normal-awake cycle but regardless, wanted to stay in bed all day. Of course, her grades plummeted despite her being home schooled. What was to be done? Her parents had no clue until...her mother had remembered a story on the news from years back. That's right! Tachibana Academy, a school for the Disabled, was located not too far away, in Toronto! She could be cared for physically, as well as mentally, and receive her education all in one. But there was one thing Annette's parents had to do on their part...could they really let their daughter go and to have such freedom to do what she wanted without their supervision?
Annette was pleased to hear not only was she going to school somewhere else, but she was going to have a much larger degree of freedom in public! She was going to dress comfortably! Stylish! She was going to listen to music anywhere she wanted when she was not in class (...okay-maybe a little IN class sometimes)! The best part, she could make more friends that came closer to understanding her issues and hopefully be able to have her social life back! Obviously, she was a lot happier after that but there was still making it through the rest of the year so she could go to the school at least only one year behind.
Annette made it; passing with grades that only just made the cut but she was able to make up for earlier in the year. Having tackled that problem, she now began planning her strike upon the next one: Tachibana Academy. She was ready for it and she knew. Her life was about to change for the better...
...'Eh, I'll worry about it next month in my active phase. I'm too exhausted for that now.'

Personality: Annette is effectively two people under the rule of her condition. She used to be fairly mellow but warm toward those around her but now she seems to act like someone else entirely whether in her fatigued stage or even in her active stage. The only time she seems relatively normal are in the few days between when it is much more balanced that she seems to act a lot more like she used to. The stages for her specific form of her condition seem to cycle at an average rate of six months.
Fatigued - Annette often lacks the wish to show much response toward others. While she does anyway, it can easily be judged that she would often rather be in bed asleep than doing much else. She can be very moody and often radiates sarcasm all over her language. However, she does not completely lose her personality. She still very much enjoys what she normally enjoys and will even accept the invitation for company. She just seems to regress into a more childish form of herself. She enjoys acting lazy and seems to have a much larger appreciation for the little things like ramen noodles, cartoons, and that guy with the funny hair on the show about aliens teaching the Romans how to fly or whatever.
...Yeah, she still doesn't really care for the show at all.-The guy just makes her feel better about herself.
Active - It is probably her new found freedom and the excitement which comes along with it that is the cause of this behavior but during this six-month period, Annette begins acting much more hyper and happy. She is difficult to bring down and loves getting out. She can be a little touchy-feely during this phase and absolutely adores anything small and fuzzy...and animal related in any way pretty much. During this time, Annette is a much more positive and expressive person. Unlike during the other half of the year, she is much more friendly to other people and, though her sarcasm does not disappear, it largely shrinks and is only used to mess with other people. On top of it all though, Annette is very playful during this time and is not afraid to do something like hop on your back at random and yell something along the lines of, "FORWARD, MY STEED!"
Captain Awesome USMC
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Post by TheMootking Wed Aug 05, 2015 1:05 am

I like the sound of the character, and it was an interesting disease that I've never heard of. I did have to go away and research it a little before making complete sense of the profile, though. You might want to add a few notes in there about the fluctuating symptoms rather than describing the differences between her stages. Many people might not know what that means.

However, I do feel that her backstory isn't fleshed out enough. We see no mention of her ability in school, her friends or really much about her interests. It's very focused on the disease, which isn't the entirety of her character. All we know about her is that she likes to sit in her room and listen to music. That sounds like a pretty boring character to play, to me. Sure, a condition like that can override many priorities but that doesn't mean she loses all interests and talents. It'd be nice to add some more "fluff" to her backstory that isn't related to the condition.

Other than that, the appearance, personality, grammar and everything else is good!
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Post by Captain Awesome USMC Wed Aug 05, 2015 2:46 am

A'ight, I'll get onto it and bring 'er home. ;P
I'll let you know when I've completed my edits.
Captain Awesome USMC
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Post by Raiden Wed Aug 05, 2015 9:44 am

I second every word Mootking said. I was actually really, really confused about how her condition works - at first you just mention that she's in pain and lacks energy, and later you make it sound almost like she has a split personality. I'm sure that this all makes sense in context, but I kinda sorta need that context in order to make sense of it, you know? I'd personally dedicate a paragraph or two solely to explaining exactly how her disease works. And yeah, the backstory is pretty lackluster. We never learn why she decided to become the black sheep of the family - was there an event that caused her to rebel or did she reach some sort of realization? I mean, sure, teens are known to rebel, but not THAT drastically, not without a good reason, at least. I'd love to learn more about her life, because literally the only event you described that ever happened to her was that she got sick. I'd like to ask you to expand the backstory greatly in that area in order to develop her as a person and not just a vessel for a disease.
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